Les Amants Criminels (1999) from Tuna

Les Amants Criminels (1999) is a run of the mill, stereotypical French teen angst film, with Natacha Régnier (The Dreamlife of Angels) as the girl, and Jérémie Rénier as her boyfriend.

NUDITY REPORT

Regnier shows breasts and buns in a swim and sex scene.  
 Oh, maybe I should mention the fact that they kill a classmate for no particular reason, bury him in the woods, and are kidnapped by a Goliath bisexual cannibal mountain man. Being a French film, it has a tragic ending. 

DVD info from Amazon.

bare bones

They ask us to like the cannibal bisexual kidnapper, which is an awful lot to require from an audience. The film is technically competent, but really  lacks a good script (or even a clue as to what is entertaining). 

The Critics Vote

  • no reviews from the regulars. There are some reviews at the IMDb site. 

The People Vote ...

  • With their votes ... IMDB summary: IMDb voters score it 5.9 
  • With their dollars ... a bomb. total gross $50k
IMDb guideline: 7.5 usually indicates a level of excellence, about like three and a half stars from the critics. 6.0 usually indicates lukewarm watchability, about like two and a half stars from the critics. The fives are generally not worthwhile unless they are really your kind of material, about like two stars from the critics. Films under five are generally awful even if you like that kind of film, equivalent to about one and a half stars from the critics or less, depending on just how far below five the rating is.

My own guideline: A means the movie is so good it will appeal to you even if you hate the genre. B means the movie is not good enough to win you over if you hate the genre, but is good enough to do so if you have an open mind about this type of film. C means it will only appeal to genre addicts, and has no crossover appeal. D means you'll hate it even if you like the genre. E means that you'll hate it even if you love the genre. F means that the film is not only unappealing across-the-board, but technically inept as well.

Based on this description, this film is a D+.

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