Eurotrip (2004) from Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy; Greg Wroblewski) and Tuna

Why did I wait so long to see this movie about four American kids wandering around Europe? I was scared off by the lukewarm critical response and the equally tepid box office. I was wrong. It was wildly underrated. This film is in exceptionally bad taste, is completely politically incorrect, and is absolutely hilarious.

It was scripted by three of the writers from Seinfeld, and is structured quite a bit like a Seinfeld episode, in that elements established early in the film are re-used for comical effect throughout the script. For example, our hero (Scotty) gets dumped by his girlfriend on graduation day. If that weren't humiliating enough, the band at the graduation party features a raunchy lead singer (Matt Damon) who is obviously the real lover of Scotty's girlfriend, and his new hit song is about how they are engaged in all kids of kinky sex behind Scotty's back, but "Scotty Doesn't Know".

Scotty's mortification doesn't end there. The song becomes a monster hit worldwide and no matter where he goes in the world, everyone is singing the song "Scotty Doesn't Know". Everyone, from English soccer hooligans to the Pope, grooves to Scotty's embarrassment. That's only a tiny running theme, barely noticeable in the film, but hilarious nonetheless. The actual trip to Europe is based on a wild exaggeration of ethnic stereotypes and American urban legends about Europe, and I found most of it side-splitting.

In Amsterdam, one of the kids ends up in a kinky sex club, and the dominatrix (Lucy Lawless) gives him a "safe word" to use if he wants the sexual fantasy to end. Unfortunately, the word turns out to be a bit difficult for an American, or for anyone:

In Eastern Europe, they end up in Bratislava, the movie version of which looks like one of those towns near Chernobyl which has been abandoned - no movement in town except trash blowing through the deserted streets, virtually every window broken. They encounter a cheerful local who tells them, "It's good you came in Summer. It gets a little depressing here in Winter."

Since they were robbed in Amsterdam and had to hitchhike, they are only in Bratislava because their German-speaking driver didn't understand where they really wanted to go. They have no passports, no money, and no way to communicate with the outside world. The sum total of all their earthly possessions is $1.83. That's the bad news. The good news is that they are in Slovakia, where $1.83 is more than the total Gross Domestic Product. They are able to have a meal that would not disappoint Henry VIII, buy clothes that would satisfy James Bond, tip the waiter, and still have twenty seven cents left to go out clubbing. The tip they give their waiter is a nickel. He looks at it, goes over to the owner of the restaurant, slaps him, and says "See this. I have a nickel. I can buy my own hotel."

The situation in Vatican City is masterful, and that mini-adventure is structured exactly like a complete Seinfeld episode. The two kids are looking for the one kid's German girlfriend, who is with a tour group somewhere in the Vatican. They get lost in the Vatican and accidentally ring the bell that announces the death of the Pope, although they don't know its significance. This causes a crowd of mourners to gather outside in St Peter's Square. A bit later, the kids accidentally set fire to one of the Pope's hats by getting it too close to some sacred candles. They take the hat and throw it in a fireplace. Now if you took Seinfeld 101, you know how this ties in. The smoke from that fireplace announces to the expectant crowd outside that a new Pope has been elected. When the boys try to make everything look untouched by getting another hat out of the closet, the one guy ends up with the hat on his head. He trips, gets wound up in the drapes, and ends up on a little patio with a Pope hat on his head, wrapped in golden drapes, and holding a curtain rod. From a distance it looks like ... well, I'll bet you can figure out how the crowd reacts.

I also give the film lots of extra points for gratuitous nudity. In one scene for example, the boys wander into a nude European beach, only to find out that (like most nude European beaches) it is filled with gay guys and old guys and tourists hoping to see naked women. When they consult their guidebook, it tells them that the real European women are down a few miles at another beach. Here comes the gratuitous nudity. The scene then cuts to that other beach, which must have three dozen topless beautiful women all rubbing suntan oil on one another sensuously and making out. All of these women are extras, and this scene has nothing to do with the rest of the film.

There were some scenes that went on too long and were a bit too creepy. There was a gay stalker who molested the boys on a train. There was a battle in Paris between two characters doing robot-mime. Either of those might have worked if used as a fast in-out gag, but both stayed way beyond their welcome.

NUDITY REPORT

  • The nudity is just about non-stop. Various topless female extras and full-frontal male nudity from more extras.
  • No full-frontal female, but breasts in the Amsterdam club, and on the beach
  • Male buns from: Scott Mechlowicz, Jacob Pitts, Travis Wester
  • Breasts from: Jessica Boehrs, Molly Schade

DVD info from Amazon

  • widescreen, unrated version

  • party commentary

  • deleted scenes

  • behind-the-scenes on the nude beach scene

  • alternate ending

The big problem with the film is that is hasn't much of an audience. They made a funny film, but they didn't know how to market it, or even to whom it should be marketed. It's a sophomoric lowbrow teen comedy, but it is rated R, thus locking out an important part of its audience. Of course, American Pie was in the same boat, but unlike American Pie, which was fundamentally benign, even sentimental, this movie is deeply cynical, ala Seinfeld. The combination of Seinfeld and American Pie appeals tremendously to me, but obviously there is a small number of people 18 and older who want to see politically incorrect jokes, raunchy sex, gratuitous nudity, and the Pope groovin' to "Scotty Doesn't Know".

If you like raunchy, offensive comedy, get this DVD when it becomes available. You will not regret it.

Tuna's thoughts in yellow:

Eurotrip was produced by the same people that brought us Old School and Road Trip. The premise is simple -- what would happen if four American High School Graduates were turned loose in Europe. Like the two movies mentioned above, Scoopy loved the irreverent, politically incorrect humor, and I was not as amused, probably because I don't relate to the characters. I did find this the funniest of the three, and liked certain scenes very much. The schtick in the Vatican was priceless.

The film finds much of its humor in exaggerating stereotypes, but also has some running gags to help with continuity. It is well made, although some of the gags are way too long on screen. IF this is your kind of humor, and you relate to the characters, it will be great fun for you. I will stick to European Vacation. Based on this description, it is a C+.

The DVD is chock full of special features, including deleted scene, an alternate ending, links to the nude scenes and unrated scenes and commentary.

The Critics Vote ...

  • James Berardinelli 1/4

The People Vote ...

  • IMDB summary. IMDb voters score it 5.9/10, Yahoo voters score it a B.
  • Box Office Mojo. A major loser. It was budgeted at $25 million for production, and the distribution/advertising costs are estimated around $15 million. It grossed only $17 million.
The meaning of the IMDb score: 7.5 usually indicates a level of excellence equivalent to about three and a half stars from the critics. 6.0 usually indicates lukewarm watchability, comparable to approximately two and a half stars from the critics. The fives are generally not worthwhile unless they are really your kind of material, equivalent to about a two star rating from the critics, or a C- from our system. Films rated below five are generally awful even if you like that kind of film - this score is roughly equivalent to one and a half stars from the critics or a D on our scale. (Possibly even less, depending on just how far below five the rating is.

My own guideline: A means the movie is so good it will appeal to you even if you hate the genre. B means the movie is not good enough to win you over if you hate the genre, but is good enough to do so if you have an open mind about this type of film. C means it will only appeal to genre addicts, and has no crossover appeal. (C+ means it has no crossover appeal, but will be considered excellent by genre fans, while C- indicates that it we found it to be a poor movie although genre addicts find it watchable). D means you'll hate it even if you like the genre. E means that you'll hate it even if you love the genre. F means that the film is not only unappealing across-the-board, but technically inept as well. Any film rated C- or better is recommended for fans of that type of film. Any film rated B- or better is recommended for just about anyone. We don't score films below C- that often, because we like movies and we think that most of them have at least a solid niche audience. Now that you know that, you should have serious reservations about any movie below C-.

Based on this description, both reviewers agree that this is correctly scored a C+, although Scoop really liked it and Tuna was lukewarm. Scoop says, "If you like raunchy, PI comedy with lots of nudity, this is my favorite one of the millennium so far - as funny, more disrespectful, and far raunchier than Road Trip, American Wedding, or Old School."

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