The Seniors (1978) from Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy; Greg Wroblewski)

This college comedy movie is based on a funny premise.

Four seniors simply don't want to leave college and join the free world, so they devise a scheme to get a grant to do a graduate study. A local Nobel Prize winner will rubber stamp anything his student assistant brings him to sign, and the various appropriate agencies will rubber stamp any grant request from this unparalleled genius. It is therefore only a matter of bribing the nerdy student assistant with the promise of unbridled passion with a love goddess, and they are off to the races.

Our lads are no fools, either. They know they can't study the origins of the universe or the social interaction of fruitbats, so they get a grant to study something they really understand in a passionate way - the mating habits of liberated college women. They get a $50,000 grant, pay the "volunteers" $20 per observation, and they are off to the races.
Then it dawns on them that the math doesn't work out right. At the rate they are getting laid, they'll be broke in a year and have to get jobs anyway. So they make the scheme self-perpetuating by asking for male volunteers - at the price of a $50 donation to medical science. It soon becomes evident that their scheme is very popular and very lucrative as well, since they are realizing a profit of $30 every time they place a man and woman together.

NUDITY REPORT
Breasts aplenty, but mostly anonymous, and no other body parts. See the main report

Eventually, they attract the attention of bankers, investors, wall street financiers, medical supply companies, and various others who can spot a profit in the plan, and our four horny college seniors are suddenly sitting on one of the most powerful new start-up corporations in history, complete with greedy and powerful enemies.

Unfortunately, there has to be more in a successful movie than one funny idea, and there wasn't any more here. The dialogue just isn't funny, the "acting" sounds like radio D.J's reading their copy, there are some completely silly sitcom-level sub-plots, the humor derives mainly from silly misunderstandings, and the whole thing just doesn't deliver on its promise.

DVD info from Laser's Edge

  • Full-screen format, in a set with three other student-themed films

The most interesting things about the movie:

(1) a topless scene from Priscilla Barnes as the love goddess

(2) miscellaneous nudity from the co-eds in the "study"

(3) an early performance from Dennis Quaid as one of the silly frat boys

(4) Alan Reed - the voice of Fred Flintstone - playing a cartoon character, as usual (the Nobel Prize laureate), but this time in convenient human form.

The Critics Vote

  • no major reviews online

 

The People Vote ...

IMDb guideline: 7.5 usually indicates a level of excellence, about like three and a half stars from the critics. 6.0 usually indicates lukewarm watchability, about like two and a half stars from the critics. The fives are generally not worthwhile unless they are really your kind of material, about like two stars from the critics. Films under five are generally awful even if you like that kind of film, equivalent to about one and a half stars from the critics or less, depending on just how far below five the rating is.

My own guideline: A means the movie is so good it will appeal to you even if you hate the genre. B means the movie is not good enough to win you over if you hate the genre, but is good enough to do so if you have an open mind about this type of film. C means it will only appeal to genre addicts, and has no crossover appeal. D means you'll hate it even if you like the genre. E means that you'll hate it even if you love the genre. F means that the film is not only unappealing across-the-board, but technically inept as well.

Based on this description, this film is a C-. Funny idea, but sloppy, unprofessional execution.

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