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Overview:
Theatrical
movies took back the top places from the cable group
this year. Of the top 14 nude performances, 13 came
from movies. Some of the nudest cable shows were
shut out, or nearly so, and the six TV shows that
did make the list mostly finished in the bottom
third of the balloting. It's not that the cable
shows became tamer, but rather that they lacked star
power in their nude scenes while the movie group was
filled with familiar faces, many of whom were making
their nude debuts, like the top two finishers (Sarah
Silverman and Olivia Munn).
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| 19t |
Clémence
Poesy in Hopper vu par
short art
project
Here's a tip
for your future art projects: get one of France's
sexiest young actresses to stand stark naked in
front of an open window for a few minutes.
"And then what?" you wonder.
Does it matter?
You probably know her best from
the Harry Potter series, but you can also see
Clemence naked in The Silence of Joan, Sans moi,
Bienvenue chez les Rozes and Olga's Sommer.
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| 19t |
Natalie
Dormer in Game of Thrones
season two
Hey - isn't that
Anne Boleyn?
Natalie broke through as Henry VIII's most famous
wife in The Tudors. She was also a topless brunette
in that role, but I liked her better as a topless
(and bottomless) blond in The Fades.
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| 19t |
Meg Chambers Steedle in Boardwalk
Empire
season three
The 2008
Northwestern grad sang, danced and got nekkid as
Nucky's bubbly showbiz mistress in the latest
season's adventures in Atlantic City's
Prohibition-era underworld.
(Spoiler alert). Sadly, her fate was sealed in
season three and the character can't be coming back
for season four.
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| 19t |
Hannah Ware in Boss
season two
Hannah plays
Kelsey Grammer's estranged and troubled daughter on
Boss. Boss was cancelled after a second season that
averaged less than 400,000 viewers per episode. The
producers have said that there may or may not be a
two-hour movie to wrap up the loose plot threads.
Which means we may or may not
get another look.
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| 17t
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Mary-Louise
Parker in Weeds
season eight
(final season)
After a glorious
career filled with some beautiful nudity, especially
her full frontal and rear exposure in Angels in
America (which made our 2003 list), Mary-Louise is
still incredibly hot at 48.
In the final season of Weeds she performed this
graceful and sexy skinny dip which left nothing to the
imagination.
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| 17t
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Adeline
Rebeillard in Sexual Chronicles of a French Family
5.2 at IMDB
Variety said: "The
superficial provocation offers diverting date-night
fare for open-minded heterosexual couples and
swingers, though its superiority (artistic or
otherwise) to actual porn is debatable. The style is
Dogma-esque but the content closer to Zalman King,
with softcore titillation pretty much the entire
agenda."
I have nothing to add other than to note that the
film's level of explicitness often moves closer to
hardcore than soft.
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| 16
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Sophie Rundle in
Episodes
season two
Episodes, the show
which stars Matt LeBlanc as a comedically
fictionalized version of Matt LeBlanc, has featured
female nudity in only one episode, in which Sophie
played a LeBlanc stalker called "Labia."
If they had to limit exposed flesh to only one cast
member, I have to say that they made a great choice.
Sophie's career has so far been limited to brief
appearances in a few TV episodes, but you have to give
props to that spectacular natural chest!
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| 14t
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Jessica Marais in
Magic City
season one
Before she was cast as
the philandering trophy wife of an incredibly evil mob
boss played by Danny Huston on Magic City, red-hot
Jessica was largely unknown to international
audiences. She had spent the previous five years on an
Aussie TV show called Packed to the Rafters.
She just gave birth to her first child in May!
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| 14t |
Piper
Perabo in Looper
7.8 at IMDB
After her acting and
singing debut in Coyote Ugly, she was nominated for
several awards which marked her as a favorite female
newcomer in 2000, but her career languished for about
a decade before she secured a 2010 Golden Globe
nomination for her role in "Covert Affairs."
Even with that
nomination, she still seems like someone whose career
has amounted to less than expected or deserved.
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| 12t |
Juno Temple in Killer Joe
6.9 at IMDB
Killer Joe is one seriously
twisted-ass redneck movie filled with despicable
characters and operatic violence, but Juno at least
gives the viewer somebody in the film who seems like a
decent, if damaged, human being.
And she also looks mighty good nekkid.
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12t
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Ashley
Hinshaw in About Cherry
4.7 at IMDB
I never heard of the
beautiful, young, blue-eyed blonde before her
performance in Chronicle this year, but she's older
than she looks (24) and seems to be well on her
way toward fame. She has five IMDb credits in 2012,
and four more in the pipeline for 2013.
It's probably safe to say that she won't need to buy a
bus ticket back to Indiana.
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| 11
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Jessica Chastain in
Lawless
7.4 at IMDB
I gotta be honest
here. This scene is so dark you can barely tell that
she's naked. So why did it place so high?
Because it's Jessica Effin' Chastain, who is well on
her way to the A-list as a performer (as I write this,
she's a front runner for the 2012 Best Actress Oscar)
and who, by the way, also happens to be gorgeous.
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| 10
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Michelle
Williams in Take This Waltz
6.5 at IMDB
I think it is fair to
say that this performance probably should have won.
Look at the first place winner below. This performance
takes place in the same movie, involves a woman who
has a much sexier body, and shows more flesh for a
longer duration. Objectively, this is a better scene
than the winner!
What went against Michelle is that she has done nude
scenes before, while Sarah Silverman had not, and our
poll does not reflect the best scene as much as it
reflects the one people most wanted to see. Like
zombies, we crave fresh flesh.
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9
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Camilla Luddington
in Californication
season five
This was the leading vote getter
among the television series performances, and although
it consists of a good series of scenes, its top
placement was kind of a surprise because Spartacus,
Game of Thrones and True Blood had some excellent nude
scenes in 2012.
Surprisingly, True Blood and Spartacus were shut out
in the balloting, while Game of Thrones barely snuck
one scene into 19th place.
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8
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Dreama Walker in
Compliance
6.7 at IMDB
Compliance is a difficult movie to
watch. It involves an attractive young fast food
employee (Dreama, of course) who is forced to submit
to an invasive strip search based on an anonymous
phone call from an alleged police officer to the
store's shift supervisor.
It sounds improbable? Maybe so, but it is based on an
actual incident and stays fairly close to the facts of
the case!
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7
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Laura
Prepon in Lay the Favorite
4.7 at IMDB
Prepon has a minor
role in this film and her nudity consists solely of
some brief topless sunbathing.
Why did she finish so high? Men have been waiting to
see those sweater-stuffers a long time, since an
18-year-old Prepon started playing Donna on That '70s
Show. That's nearly a decade and a half.
It was worth the wait.
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6
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Ali Cobrin in American Reunion
6.9 at IMDB
A great raunchy scene, as we've
come to expect from this popular series of films.
A popular internet debate: Which older celeb does Ali
most resemble? The most frequently mentioned choices
are Marisa Tomei, Rose Byrne, Mia Kirshner and
Michelle Borth.
I'm not sure it matters. One thing is certain: she's
gorgeous.
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5
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Kristen Stewart in
On The Road
6.3 at IMDB
We've been waiting for this nudity
since K-Stew became a major pop culture figure from
the sparkly vampire movies, but did you know that she
has been appearing in movies since she was 10? Her
first appearance was a tiny, uncredited role in the
immortal cinema classic, The Flintstones in Viva Rock
Vegas.
Although she has been in films for more than a decade,
she's still only 22. Does that mean we can look
forward to a lot more nudity? Maybe not. She's a
complicated and shy person who frequently muses about
quitting acting altogether.
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4
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Nadine
Velazquez in Flight
7.6 at IMDB
Gorgeous woman. Spectacular nudity.
And best of all - totally gratuitous! Given that it is
not necessary to the plot of the film, it is there
entirely for the purpose of titillation.
Color me titillated.
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3
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Helen
Hunt in The Sessions
7.5 at IMDB
Helen did some spectacular nudity
way back in 1992 in The Waterdance, when she was still
in her twenties. She then waited twenty years before
making the same kind of commitment again.
Coincidentally, in both cases she was having sex with
a man with some kind of significant physical
impairment.
Looking back:
Given her talent, looks, and willingness to commit to
a role, and given her natural appeal on camera, I
wonder if she might have become an A-list movie star
if she hadn't decided to commit eight years of her
life to a sitcom.
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2
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Olivia Munn in Magic Mike
6.2 at IMDB
Before she showed any flesh, Olivia
was already on the radar as one of the sexiest women
on the planet. Maxim magazine rated her eighth on its
2010 list of the 100 sexiest women, then bumped her up
to #2 in 2011. She's also well known as a comedian and
computer geek.
Is it any surprise that her first exposure send her
rocketing toward the top of our annual balloting?
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1
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Sarah Silverman in
Take This Waltz
6.5 at IMDB
There is a formula which can predict
a high finish in our annual balloting.
Find an attractive female celebrity
from North America who has been immensely popular in
the pop culture spotlight for a long time, and who
shows a lot of flesh for the first time.
The likelihood of placing high in the
balloting depends on the combination of these factors:
the more attractive the better, the more flesh shown
for the first time the better, the more fame the
better.
The formula is nearly infallible.
Silverman, like many previous winners, fit the profile
to a T, as did several others in the top eight. If
Silverman had been merely topless while Munn, Prepon,
Walker or Stewart had shown it all, then whichever one
went full frontal probably would have won. This year:
advantage Silverman.
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